He Is.

So, I was just writing some responses to a worsheet for one my classes when I realized something....

In the Geiblestudy last week someone brought up the whole concept of "The Dark Night of the Soul." Anyways, I knew that I had heard some stuff about it before, and it was kind of a side-track from the holistic idea of the biblestudy, so I didn't think too much into it until it resurfaced today. The whole idea of the dark night of the soul is that we tend to rely on “feelings” in order to witness God within us even though we know that we constantly have the fullness of God within us. So, this “Dark Night of the Soul” is not God withdrawing himself from within us, but rather, it is God withdrawing the emotions from us so that we can rely more fully on Him and give Him our entire selves. Anyways, I was more hung up on the idea of knowing that God is there even when we don't "feel" that He's there. And I really began applying this to my life right now. Sometimes I don't "feel" like God is there on Sundays when the team is leading worship...but then it occured to me...I have the fullness of God within me, so even when I don't think like He's there, He is. When I don't think He's leading through me, He is. And when I don't think the students get it, He's still there.

Break Has Arrived

Well, it's Fall Break! Let's see what's been going on...

On monday I went the bible study down on 31st street because John Geib was leading it. It was pretty great. He was discussing the "exchanged life" concept. A couple of us are doing this drama thing on Sunday for the JH service that is sort of based on one of the ideas that we talked about. It's that everyone you meet, including yourself, will fall into one of four categories: Pagan, Infant Christian, Worldly Christian, or Spiritual (wo)Man. It should be kind of cool. Needless to say, the biblestudy was definitly life-changing.

Tuesday was the normal. I had the whole day full of classes, meetings, lessons, and worship team. We ended up at starbucks after worship team (like normal) and Josh and I had a great conversation about some stuff about the worship team and such. I'm excited to see how things are going to get going.

So amid the craziness of my life, I was also smacked with two exams (hermeneutics and macroeconomics) on wednesday back-to-back. It wasn't too bad though. I think I did pretty well on my hermeneutics and I got an 85 on the macroecon exam. Hopefully I'll be able to pull that up to an A or A- by the end of the sememster though. I've got to go meet with my advisor sometime soon though because I'm pretty much changing my entire schedule. The way they set it up for me, and the professors they chose, are definetly in need of some change.

Yesterday was the first day of break. I slept in really late (like noon!)...later than I think I've ever slept in. (well other than when we got home from catalyst at who knows when in the morning) Anyways, I pretty much just hung around the house and taught some lessons and ended up with Kristen. We went to muggswigz and then back to her place so I could re-string her guitar.

And today is Friday, the best of them all. Why you ask? Well, tonight I have the opportunity to play with some folks from RiverTree at a church out in austintown at their once a month contemporary service. It's going to be a great time. I realized that I kind of miss not leading if that makes sense. It's just nice to know the pressure is not all on me to be up front and well...leading. Plus I love playing different instruments...and I'm going to be playing bass and keyboard. I haven't played those in a long time since I'm always usually playing acoustic. I think I'm going to be switching up the SH worship team a bit...you know, letting some other people step up that way I can kind of have a break (well atleast of leading) some weeks. Plus it's going to be cool because Benny, Jason, and I are looking into getting some of the stage stuff back out in the youth room and Adam and Nick are going to work on some lighting stuff in there once Massillon gets more up and running.

So that's what's been going on. Thank's for caring enough to read and have a great day!

Almost Fall Break

Fall break is this week...which means it's only going to be a 3 day week! Sadly though, I've still got a paper and a couple big exams though. Sad day. So anyways, it's going to be a good time to be able to rest up over the extra long weekend. This Friday I'm playing at some church in Youngstown with some guys from RiverTree...I think it's going to be a good time. I really enjoy playing in bands and stuff like that--to bad I'm not good enough to be David Crowder though, haha. Anyways, last week was pretty hectic school-wise too with midterms and such because of the break this week and everything. On Friday Kristen and I went out thrifting and I got some sweet coats then we hit up muggs. Then on Saturday, I spent the day beginning to work on my lit. paper so I wouldn't have to do it all Monday since I've got tests to study for too. But that night I "jammed" with Kristen and Cameron in the youth room...it was a good time. Then I met up with Lauren, Danielle, and Emily since they're all home for the weekend cause their fall break was a week early. It's good seeing them again, but seeing them always makes me realize that I really do miss them. I think I'm going to go up and visit Lauren sometime since she's not too far away. We'll see...but for now I'm going to get going...Geib is going to be speaking tomorrow in chapel, so I'm going to get up early and go.

Some New Stuff

In case you haven't yet noticed, I just finished spending some time doing some cool new stuff to the site...so check it all out!

Oh...and by the way, I got an "A" on my first hermeneutics paper!

I Guess I'll Explain Something

Alright alright, for sake of not being a "tease" i'll tell you guys a little bit more about the weekend. (even though you could always e-mail/call/IM me to talk about it) One thing that really hit me this week was the idea of community. Well, i guess not the concept itself, seeing that it's not really a new idea for me...but it was interesting what Bill Hybels said. He was talking about some fot he major problems with the 20-somethings (haha, i'm close enough) that do ministry. He said that we are all impressed and infatuated with the idea and concept of community in Acts 2 but we can't live it. I realized that he was exactly right. There is nothing more that I want than to be in that type of community with other believers, but I have no idea how to do it. Same thing with the worship team...I want to have that type of community, but I don't think i can necessarily create it. In fact, I don't think it can't really be "created" per say at all...rather, it has to develop. Anyways, it hit me that all throughout my time in the SH ministry at RiverTree I had been searching for that community through different groups of friends and ministries, but I could never really find it. I guess I'm kind of in the same boat right now too...still looking and trying to find that community somewhere. I don't know, I was talking to Kristin yesterday and I just got this overwhelming feeling that something big is going to happen. (good or bad, i don't know) Whether it be with me and the young adults at Rivertree, or the worship team, or something with massillon...I have no idea. There's so much more...but Dr. Watson and hermeneutics calls. Have a good night!

Home From Catalyst!

Wow, these past couple of days have been awesome! Catalyst was really great. I don't think there were any speakers i necessarily disliked, and the worship was good too. Actually, I probably would have not even have noticed the problems unless Adam hadn't mentioned it. The speakers were: Andy Stanley, John Maxwell, Louie Giglio, Malcolm Gladwell, Donald Miller, Erwin McManis, and Bill Hybels. I wanted to get several of their books, but for some reason, they were actually more expensive at the conference than they would be if you walked down to berean or borders and bought them. I guess it was good though, since I really don't have money to be buying a bunch of books anyways.

There was sooo much talked about this week I can't even share it all online. So if you want to know more about the past couple days, ask me about it sometime and I'll give you the deeper thoughts of the weekend!

Hotlanta Here I Come

In atlanta for a couple days for catalyst with some folks from the Tree. I'll have to tell you (whoever it is that reads this) all about it when I get back!

David Crowder Revelations

Well, I thought this weekend was going to really suck, but it wasn't so bad after all. Tonight I went to the oktoberfest thing in the park for awhile and watched a couple of bands play...but I got there kind of late so it was pretty much over already. Anyways, I saw some people there I knew...but I just don't feel comfortable going up and hanging out with them. I just don't know what to do...I want to get to know people, but sometimes I feel like there's just a huge wall standing between me and everyone else. I honestly just don't know what else I can do...I'm always trying to be on-campus hanging out...but it seems that no one is ever out or willing to really take the time to get to know me. Anyways, I ended up over at lazer quest then hung out with Kristen for the night...it was acutally a lot of fun. We discovered tonight that we are really similar.

Well, I bought the new David Crowder Band cd on Tuesday...at first I was a little weary of it because it's not necessarily you're typical DCB cd, but I really like it. Anyways, I was driving home tonight and I was listening to the song "Do Not Move." For some reason, I just felt like God was talking to me...I'm in such a weird position right now...and to a certain extent, I've been wanting to go back to last summer. I remember thinking to myself during summer..."if I could just freeze life it would be perfect." I somehow got stuck in this mindset of not wanting to move...I just wanted to stay where I was and keep things the way things had been going. This, however, is not God's plan for us. Well anyways, this song says..."I don't want to move, I don't think I could...I don't want to move, I don't think I should." Things change, even if I don't want them to...but God is in control, even if I don't really want to be "moving" in a sense. Anyways, the song keeps going and he just kesp saying "breathe in deeper now." And I realized God is just calling me to trust him...breathe it in, let things go, let things be. I don't need to be in control, and I don't know why I think that I do. Human nature I guess...

Let me want to move....Let me want to change...moreover, let me breathe in deeper now.